Losing a job is a kick in the seed-maker.
When I came home with my second child, I was told that the company was dropping 50 percent of its employees, including me.
I don’t think I have ever experienced, in quite the same way, the feeling of looking over the edge of the abyss, and having some sense of how close I was to it. In reality, I went on fairly quickly to another job, but it was a creative time, too. I love this article from Elephant Journal:
You are a fucking unicorn. You are a fucking unicorn and all this time, you have been trying to be a horse. You very carefully hid your horn every time you stepped in the room, pretending that you were more horselike and able to do horse-like things but what you were really doing was repressing the best parts of you. It’s simple: unicorns are unicorns and horses are horses. One can’t be like the other—it just doesn’t work that way. When you hide who you are, truly, madly, deeply, at the core of your being and try to fit into some other idea of you, you start dull; you shine less. Your horn starts to lose its power because it’s not being infused with everything it needs to stay alive and before you know it, your heart is crumpling in your hands.
(It gives so many opportunities for permission to cry in new ways.) It reminds me that decision-making is easier for people who have to go to the bathroom. Everything gets pretty clear when you’re under some pressure.